Against Her Will Read online

  Before the attack, he couldn’t keep his eyes or hands off her. Yet, now she feared he’d no longer want her, and dreaded life without him.

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  A little later, a nurse brought her a light breakfast, but she had difficulty in eating it due to her stitched lip. Afterwards, a doctor, a kind looking man with a warm smile, came over to see her.

  ‘How are you feeling this morning Donna?’

  ‘All right,’ she lied.

  ‘We’ve had the results of your blood tests. All negative, thankfully. But you have four broken ribs, which we’ve bandaged, so I suggest you take it easy for a while so the bones get a chance to knit together again. Your face is badly bruised, but I assure you that should heal within week or two without any scarring. It looks a lot worse than it really is... honestly – so don’t worry. Oh and by the way, I’ve written to your GP advising him to arrange for you to see a counsellor to help you come to terms with your ordeal. I imagine he’ll contact you, once you get out of here.’

  ‘When can I go home?’ she said.

  ‘Soon. But you’ll need several weeks rest before you even consider going back to work.’

  Donna looked up at the doctor anxiously. ‘How will I ever get over this?’

  ‘That’s a difficult question to answer. It all depends on the individual, and whilst you’ll never forget what happened, I honestly think you can get through this in time. No one’s saying it’s going to be easy, but it’s amazing how resilient people are when they need to be. And if the police do manage to catch this man quickly, before he does any more damage, it’ll be a huge weight off your mind.’

  ‘I’ll never relax until they do.’

  ‘You will, I’m sure with your family’s support. This wasn’t your fault, Donna– it was a random attack – a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. You’re lucky to be alive, very lucky indeed.’ He smiled warmly at her. ‘Now if there’s any other way I can help, you only have to ask. And remember there are lots of specially trained people and organisations out there, should you need them. Most times, you just need to pick up the phone. You take care now.’

  She nodded, but didn’t think anyone could put this right.

  Chapter 3

  THEY TOLD HER BLAKE WAS WITH A CUSTOMER WHEN SHE PHONED TO ASK HIM TO PICK HER UP FROM THE HOSPITAL. So she left a message, telling him she was ready to go home. With luck he wouldn’t be too long.

  She sat in the easy chair by her bed, suitcase beside her, waiting for him to come. Her dark sunglasses covered most of her face.

  After about half an hour she looked outside and noticed it had started to rain, which just about summed up her mood. When there was no sign of him she began to feel on edge.

  It must have been another fifteen minutes before she saw him ambling towards her, apparently without a care in the world. How dare he be so insensitive?

  ‘Ready to go?’ he asked her, without even apologising.

  Feeling dejected she replied, ‘I am. So where have you been until now?’

  ‘Oh, I got stuck in traffic – and then I couldn’t find a place to park. It was horrendous.’

  ‘Blake, I’ve been sitting here for ages. People keep looking at me strangely, probably wondering what I’m doing here.’

  ‘Sorry love, but I couldn’t do much about it,’ he protested.

  She gave him a dirty look annoyed by his pathetic excuses. Her feelings of vulnerability and insecurity started to heighten again, and there he was acting as if being late didn’t matter. But to her it did... very much.

  They walked out of the hospital together, but she sauntered slowly, stooping like an old woman, waving away all his offers of help. When he walked briskly on ahead of her, it seemed like they didn’t know one another.

  All the way home, she was on tenterhooks, and his attempts to make conversation were met with stony silence.

  Their flat was in a sedate suburb of Dexford. Blake parked the car outside the four-storey block of flats. Theirs was on the ground floor. He went in first, through the small hallway into the living room, which led through to the kitchen. On the back wall, above the bookcase hung a framed photograph of Donna in her cap and gown, and directly underneath it the certificate for her First Class Mathematics Degree, her proudest moment. Further along the hall were two bedrooms; and sandwiched in between was the bathroom. All tastefully laid out with expensive fixtures and fittings.

  She shrugged aside Blake’s attempt to help her take off her coat, then went to the bathroom to freshen up. Removing her dark glasses, she surveyed herself in the mirror that took up one wall of the room, and didn’t like what she saw. The facial injuries remained almost unaltered. Her skin seemed pale. There was a haggard look about her, which she thought had aged her ten years. She cursed herself for not being able to give a good description of him, but it was no use. No matter how hard she tried, nothing came to mind, except the putrid smell of him and that strange laugh of his. The man had disguised himself too well.

  At last, with her dark glasses back on, she came out, sat down on the white leather settee, a little way from Blake watching the Sports News on TV.

  ‘All right, love?’ He smiled. ‘There’s a drink on the table if you want it.’

  ‘Thanks.’

  She took a sip, but didn’t enjoy the hot chocolate even though normally it was her favourite drink.

  Blake kept glancing at her with nervous concern. But no matter how hard he tried to strike up a conversation, it seemed he was fighting a losing battle.

  She sat staring at the screen, not seeing the action in front of her. And guessed Blake wasn’t sure what to make of her. Well, she wouldn’t say any more about her ordeal, and certainly not for his benefit. She didn’t even want to think about it. And as long as he didn’t mention the subject, she’d be all right.

  After a while, Blake got up and said, ‘So what you want for tea?’

  ‘Anything,’ she said in a disinterested tone of voice.

  ‘How about a steak and kidney pie out of the freezer?’

  ‘Sure - whatever.’

  Obviously wishing she’d show a little more enthusiasm, he went away to prepare the meal. Sadly she couldn’t motivate herself for anything.

  Later he put the plate in front of her, and watched while she ate. Despite the appetising smell of the meal, she wasn’t hungry.

  She ate slowly, and when Blake finished before her, he was quick to say, ‘Look love, if you’re not hungry, just leave it.’

  ‘Sorry.’ She put down her knife and fork.

  His lips formed a straight line of disappointment, but he didn’t say anything.

  ‘I’ll sit here for a while, if you don’t mind. Leave the TV on – all right?’

  ‘Sure, no problem. It’s up to you, love.’

  He washed up, and although he didn’t complain, Donna could tell he wasn’t happy. Well, she had more pressing things to worry over than his bruised pride. Like where her attacker was hiding. And if the police were any nearer catching him, after her almost non-existent description of him. They’d told her there were no matches on the police database to the DNA samples they’d taken. It seemed hopeless.

  She wondered how many others he’d attacked; how many more he’d beaten and raped, and was filled with a sudden rage. He was out there now, probably planning another assault. Maybe he looked ordinary, the kind of guy no one paid attention to, another anonymous nobody, but he was very dangerous and capable of anything. These thoughts made her feel very vulnerable and afraid.

  Half an hour later, Blake sat down next to her, a glum expression on his face. No doubt fed up of this situation. He kept glancing at her again as if he hoped she’d talk to him.

  ‘Blake, what the hell’s the matter with you now?’ She turned to face him in an almost aggressive manner.

  ‘Nothing, I’m concerned about you - that’s all.’

  ‘I’ll be fine, Blake. I... I just need some time...’

  ‘All right, all right.
.. I can see that. But I do worry over you, you must realise that.’

  ‘Well... I’m all right,’ Tears had welled up in her eyes. He tried to put his arms around her but she moved back from him. ‘Please don’t touch me, I’ve already told you I can’t stand that... right now.’

  With a hurt look on his face, he said, ‘Sorry.’

  They didn’t speak after that, the only sound came from the television. Around ten o’clock feeling tired, she got up off the sofa and sighed. ‘Think I’m going to bed now,’ she informed him.

  ‘Ok, I’ll come as well.’

  In the bathroom, with difficulty she changed into her nightwear, and left the room wearing a full length red dressing gown. She got into bed, while Blake went into the bathroom, hoping to be asleep by the time he’d finished. But no. After only a few minutes she heard the door open; and dreaded what he might do next.

  He got in beside her and at once tried to snuggle up to her. She froze, then pushed him away with her elbow.

  ‘Oh for God’s sake – what now?’ He said as if she’d given him an electric shock.

  ‘Please Blake. I’ve already told you not to touch me.’

  ‘All right, suit yourself,’ he sighed, swiftly moving to own his part of the bed.

  He remained quiet after that. She sensed his impatience.

  They lay apart for a few minutes. He yawned and stretched out, before turning onto his side with his back to her, which made her tremble with anger. She pulled back the covers to get out of bed, struggled into her dressing gown, then walked to the spare room, and got into the single bed. And prayed Blake wouldn’t follow, but within a couple minutes he did.

  ‘Hey come on - surely, you’re not going to sleep in here tonight.’

  ‘Well, I’m not sleeping with you – that’s for sure...’

  He rolled his eyes. ‘Donna - I didn’t do anything. All right, so you’re upset, but I only wanted to show you some affection. I love you, always will do, no matter what happens. And I’m doing my level best for God’s sake, so why are you being so hostile to me?’

  ‘Just go, will you!’ She got out of the bed to push him towards the door with as much force as she could despite her injuries. His attitude stank. Anyone would think he was the only person hurt in this.

  Chapter 4

  DONNA HAD BEEN AWAKE A LONG TIME, WHEN SHE HEARD BLAKE MOVING ABOUT IN THEIR BEDROOM. Maybe he’d woke early too, and before long, there was a knock at the bedroom door. He popped his head round the door, an uncomfortable, embarrassed look on his face. Obviously having trouble dealing with the situation.

  ‘What is it, Blake?’

  On entering the room still wearing his dressing gown, he blushed. ‘I wanted to apologise over how I acted last night.’

  ‘Oh,’ she whispered, trying hard to stop her feelings from getting the better of her ‘It doesn’t matter.’

  ‘But it does. I was totally out of order. It was inexcusable.’ He said coming over to sit on the bed.

  ‘I’m sorry, but I can’t sleep with you right now.’

  His eyes filled with tears and he looked to the ground. ‘Ok. I can live with that.... I was just making breakfast. Do you want some?’

  Raising her eyebrows at him, she pushed herself slowly up to a sitting position. ‘No thanks. I’m not hungry. Now if you’re finished, I’d like to get dressed.’

  He moved out of the way, holding up his hands, and disappeared, probably to the kitchen, thinking about his stomach as usual.

  She didn’t do much that morning, except to keep the television switched on, but her mind was somewhere else.

  Blake read a book until mid-afternoon, when he suddenly put it to one side, got up and walked to the hall, then came back wearing his denim jacket.

  ‘Thought I’d go shopping. Do you want to come?’

  ‘What - looking like this? You’ve got to be joking, haven’t you?’

  ‘Ok, suit yourself - see you later then.’ And with that off he went.

  Donna felt insecure again, and couldn’t believe he’d leave her alone in the flat. She scampered to the window, saw him get into his car, and drive off without even glancing back. She bit her lip and burst into tears.

  Her head ached so much she took two aspirins and lay down in the spare bedroom. In the vain hope of ridding herself of her headache, she closed her eyes and hoped to drop off to sleep; but also wished Blake would hurry back.

  Just as she was dozing, the buzzer to the flat rang loudly startling her. Fear of opening the door crept through her veins. Who could it be? She was shaking when she switched on the intercom. Was that heavy breathing she heard in the background? Oh my God, what if the rapist had decided to track her down?

  ‘Miss Donna Askey?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Flowers for you, madam.’

  ‘Oh, just a minute,’ she replied, petrified by this unexpected interruption. Her heart beat faster, as she visualised so many different things. Did the attacker’s voice sound like this?

  Hurriedly, she rushed over to the window, and looked out. A florists van was indeed outside with the logo ‘Say it with Flowers.’ She saw a youth with long black hair and a cap covering most of his face. Then just before she moved away, she noticed his jacket sporting the very same logo.

  Nervously she told him to leave the flowers outside. Then returned to the window and watched him walk away and drive off. When the van disappeared out of sight, she ventured to the entrance to the flats, opened the outside door, picked up the bouquet, and returned inside, hurriedly locking herself in again.

  She couldn’t imagine who’d sent them. Maybe they were a macabre gift from the rapist, who had somehow found out where she lived. Then she saw the card, which said - ‘From all your friends and colleagues at Bluethorn.’

  Relief ran through her body. What a nice gesture, she thought. It almost brought a tear to her eye, but then she gasped, realising it meant they must know about the attack. What if they’d found out that she’d been raped too? How horrifying, the very thought of facing them when she eventually went back to work filled her with dread.

  Taking the flowers out of their cellophane wrapping, she cut and arranged them into several vases, and placed them around the room.

  A ‘Get Well Soon’ card signed by everyone came with the bouquet; and there were even a few messages that under normal circumstances would have made her smile. Very nice of them, but she didn’t need all this fuss. If she did ever find the courage to go back, she prayed they’d leave her in peace and not bombard her with questions about her ordeal.

  She sat down on the sofa anxiously waiting for Blake to return from his shopping trip, still worrying about the flower deliveryman. Maybe she was getting paranoid.

  Two hours later the front she heard the door open. ‘It’s only me’. And she breathed a great sigh of relief. But what had he been doing all this time?

  He came into the living room carrying several bags, containing mainly food - trust him to think about his stomach again.

  ‘What have you been doing – buying the whole bloody shop?’ she asked, her eyes blinking fast as if she was about to cry again.

  A look of astonishment came on his face at this, but all he said was, ‘Actually, I was looking for a present for you. Only I wasn’t sure what to get. Here, I thought this might cheer you up.’

  He gave her a bag. She looked inside; saw a pretty pink silk blouse with a bow.

  ‘It... it’s very nice.’ Tears flooded into her eyes. Having taken it out of the bag, she held it against her. It was gorgeous.

  ‘Why don’t you try it on?’

  ‘I will later.’ She gave him an uneasy smile.

  He returned her smile, then went into the kitchen to put away all the food he’d bought, coming back a few minutes later with two cups of tea. As he sat down beside her, she noticed him looking around the room at the flowers.

  ‘Hey - those are nice. They from anybody I know?’

  ‘Bluethorn sent them.’
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  ‘That’s decent of them. And a card too. You must be pleased they’re thinking about you. Those guys have a high opinion of you, Donna. When you go back they’ll welcome you with open arms – no question about it.’

  Donna blushed red with embarrassment. Her eyes widened and she shook her head slightly. ‘There’s no way I’m going back there, Blake. Someone’s told them why I’m away by now, and probably that I was raped. I’ll never be able to look them in the eye again. They’ll always doubt me – think I asked for it, seeing as I’m supposed to be so bloody attractive, or that I gave that guy some encouragement.’

  ‘Come on, why would they think that? And besides they’ll never find out the whole truth anyway. The only people who know are the police, the doctors and me. None of them would ever come into contact with Bluethorn. Donna, you’re starting to get paranoid now.’

  She ignored his last remark.

  ‘How about going out for a meal afterwards, love? Save us cooking?’

  She shook her head. ‘I’ll give it a miss. It’s not as though I’m very good company right now.’

  ‘Shall I get the dinner on?’

  ‘I’m not hungry. Do yourself something if you want – I’ll have something later.’

  ‘It’s not worth it - just for one.’

  Rubbing his face and eyes with his hands, he sat there looking irritated.

  The tension rose within her again. He was hungry. Just like he always was.

  ‘Get yourself a takeaway if you’re that hungry. You look like you could do with feeding up.’

  His eyes lit up momentarily. ‘Ok, I will - I’ll bring you a bag chips back, if you want,’ he offered.

  ‘I’ve already said I’ll have something later. How many times do I have to tell you? Just get whatever you want and leave it at that – all right!’ She disliked herself for having raised her voice, but how was she supposed to behave around him? She wanted some peace.